I know I’ve pimped many, many — many — things on Topless Robot so far in 2009, but please, if you buy only one thing this year that I tell you, make it this: the Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen Rifftrax. I have been waiting for this moment since I first suffered through the film in theaters, and certainly, it is the only way I would subject myself to ROTF’s excruciating agony one more time. I can’t tell you how much I look forward to Mike Nelson, Kevin Murphy and Bill Corbett sobbing hysterically during the interminable Shia the Beef’s-mother-inexplicably-on-pot-brownies scene; I will sob along with them, and hopefully, just maybe, I will be cleansed.
The Rifftrax can be ordered for a mere $4 here; obviously, you should avoid buying the actual Transformers 2 DVD if at all possible, instead ordering it via Netflix or borrowing it from any of the millions of horrible people who bought it this week. Truly, this is the only way I can recommend watching Transformers 2. It won’t make the movie any less awful, but the Rifftrax guys will be a small beacon of sanity in a dog-humping, robot-testicle-having, Turturro-buttocks-exposing world, and that, my friends, is priceless.