Merchandise, Movies

I Find Your Lack of Pancakes… Disturbing



?Williams-Sonoma is offering the above Star Wars-shaped pancake molds for not insubstantial $20 (you get all three). But what’s freaking me out is the accompanying sales text:

A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away, a Jedi Kitchen Master created
an epic breakfast to unleash the power of his Jedi Padawan. Using the
Force?, he created three nonstick steel pancake molds in honor of his
favorite galactic heroes and villains: Yoda?, Darth Vader? and a
stormtrooper?. Our Star Wars molds couldn’t be easier to use.
Just place them with their handles up on a preheated griddle then pour
in your batter. After the first side has set, remove the molds and flip
the pancakes. Serve a stack drenched in your favorite syrup – and let
the adventures begin.

I… I don’t even know what to say. “A Jedi Kitchen Master”? “Unleash the power of his Jedi Padawan”? “Let the adventures begin”? Shudder. I swear to god this is an FFF waiting to happen, and it ends with a Jedi sticking his dick in a syrup-covered short stack and fucking the hell out of some pancakes. You know, the older I get, the more I think the Sith were on to something. (Via Nerd Bastards)

Sponsor Content