A few weeks back, we ran the 11 best Smallville heroes who’ve shown up from out of the pages of DC Comics. Since the show is basically a DC character showcase now (with the Wonder Twins potentially jumping the shark), it been full of these superhero cameos… but also of supervillains. See, when you have a different bad guy show up every week, not all of them are going to be Brainiac. That’s just life in the ‘Ville.
So now that we’ve given the heroes their due, it’s time to bring on the bad guys, both kick-ass… and regular ass. Thanks to Warner Bros. and The CW’s draconian YouTube policies, practically the only videos of these villains available are horrible fan-made tribute videos with ridiculous music choices, so that’s what we went with (just like last time).
Brian Austin Green ain’t no Laurence Olivier, but as a freaked-out robot man, he does a fine job. I don’t think you could make Metallo work better on the screen than they did with those episodes in season 9. Robot arms and glowing kryptonite chest made us overlook his manic acting, and also the fact that he’s married to Megan Fox.
Clark Kent should have banged Maxima like a drum and that would be the end of the show. Thank you, I’m outta here.
Trying to come up with a way to accurately do Bizarro in a live-action show has to be a nightmare for writers. His origin story in the comics is full of weird back and forths, and thank God that the show didn’t try to introduce Bizarro world and the backwards talking thing (that no Superman writer seems to understand fully). You got the fun angular face thing, plus some nice Kent on Kent violence!
I’ll go out on a limb here and say that Toyman is the most accurately portrayed DC character on Smallville. His costume, look, methods, actions are all as lunatic as the comic book version. He’s a terrorist and a nuisance and Chris Gauthier plays the hell out of him. Sure, he’s not in the same class as a Zod or Doomsday, but he adds some fine crazy spice to the episodes he’s in.
James Marsters is a fantastic villain in whatever show he pops up on. As Clark’s mentor, Dr. Milton Fine, he was a much-needed source of advice since the death of Dr. Swann. As a Kryptonian supercomputer, he was deadly, crafty, and thoroughly evil. I wouldn’t be surprised if he showed up in the last seconds of the final episode just to say, “You’re all fucked now.”
The worst begins on the next page.
5) Silver Banshee
I remember looking forward to how the Silver Banshee would be portrayed on Smallville. I also remember how disappointed I was to see that it was mostly just a little bit of make-up and a horrific Stevie Nicks fright wig. Plus the whole origin story about a spirit trapped in a painting is just a little too Ducktales for me.
4) Mr. Mxyzptlk
Yeah, he’s easy to forget. They threw away the neatest Superman villain/annoyance on a guy from the Balkans who can control luck. His crimes were all gambling-related, which is really just a waste. It’s like hearing that The Joker is showing up and it turns out he’s just a guy named Mike Joker who steals cars.
3) Maxwell Lord
To properly do Maxwell Lord, you need time to tell his whole story. He needs to be set up as a benevolent businessman who then is discovered after many years to be an evil psychic who kills favorite characters. In Smallville he was just some guy in a suit who doesn’t control minds well. He’s never likable, he’s never friendly, he’s just another secret Checkmate agent. Zzzzzzz.
Yeah, he was the big bad in season 8, but most of that time he was just David Bloome waking up covered in blood and crying. For a guy who killed Superman in the comics, and has proven to be basically indestructible, the end battle lasted about as long as a thumb-wrestling match with an indistinct ending. The DC version thankfully didn’t have as much romantic fumblings and whiny guilt, just killing, killing, killing. Would have preferred the killing, killing, killing version.
1) Lex Luthor
So what if he’s Superman’s #1 nemesis. So what if Michael Rosenbaum did a spectacular job playing him. He died like a chump and didn’t really accomplish much as a supervillain. All of his world domination schemes were immediately suspect when we saw how much time they spent on him operating a coffee shop, the Talon. His grandiose schemes, so well-developed in the comics, came off as one-episode hits in Smallville, mostly hanging around the house drinking and having staring contests with Clark. Also, he gets knocked out more than most boxers, and usually by one punch.