?What’s that? “Don’t need a watch,” you say? Pshaw. If all you’re concerned about is telling the time, then you’re really missing the point. Snapping one of these bands to your wrist is a healthy way to show your allegiance to nerdery in general and a nerdy movie in specific, even if the meal threatens to shave a year off your life. While Burger King’s not the only fast food place to use watches to promote such things, they’ve been among the most consistent. For some reason, whenever cheap, plastic watches are used to spread the word about a movie, The King is usually there, dishing out these sweet plastic chronometers to the welcoming public.
All of these sets were from special value deals, but that’s not terribly important now. What’s important is that you own them, because they’re ridiculously cool, even though we can’t promise they’ll go with anything you wear. So, grab a few packs of button cells and a super-tiny screwdriver, friends — a large dose of unusually irrational nerdery awaits you after the jump.
5) The SpongeBob SquarePants Movie
?Burger King’s set of five watches coincided with The SpongeBob SquarePants Movie and was partial to some pretty seductive patterns and color schemes. Each one came with a character-specific tin and had “4-way” reversibility thanks to dual-sided bands and the respective character’s head in sticker form opposite the clock. Perfect for helping you make it to The Krusty Krab in style — and punctually, of course.
4) The Nightmare Before Christmas
Did you know they made merchandise for this movie?! Ah, we see you’ve already spit out your evening’s tea in disbelief, but rest assured, Burger King constructed a four piece collector’s set based on The Nightmare Before Christmas. Each watch came in a classy, coffin-like cardboard box with faux gift wrap design and featured characters, locations, and scenes from the flick, extending to the armbands themselves. If only choosing one, we’d like to side with the Santa version, but it’s hard to pass on Jack’s signature Spiral Hill jaunt. Also important: they’re historic as the one nick in Hot Topic’s otherwise perfect “selling stuff based on The Nightmare Before Christmas” track record.
3) The Lost World: Jurassic Park
?These things glowed in the dark, flipped open, had holograms… you name the nerdery, they dished it out. Oh yeah, not to mention the obvious — they’re dinosaur watches based on the Jurassic Park franchise. We regret that there isn’t one featuring Ian Malcolm’s bespectacled, terrified expression, but maybe they’ll get around to that when Jurassic Park IV: Dinosaurs Shooting Lasers finally hits theaters.
2) The Simpsons Movie
?The four talking watches released for The Simpsons Movie may not have been hitched with the best sound quality in the world, but they looked a level or two better than your standard fast food tie-in and came in swanky boxes. The lot included Bart, Homer, Krusty, and the family driving, each with its own related audio clip. You just can’t write off a Krusty the Clown watch with Sideshow Bob on its strap, unless Krusty Brand made it, in which case — for the love of everything – propel the thing into your nearest pit of fire and run far, far away.
1) Star Wars
?Timed with Revenge of the Sith’s DVD release, this set of six (one for each Episode) really took the whole fast food watch thing to a new level, due in no small part to the daring cylindrical display tins which each featured two embossed characters and text. The overall execution on the watches themselves was also impressive; each sturdy band was reversible, so you basically got a sweet Star Wars two-in-one deal along with an equally sweet holographic sticker behind the clock. They really put a lot of thought into these — Episode IV’s had Luke in his stormtrooper getup on one side, and a real stormtrooper on the other. Meanwhile, Revenge of the Sith’s watch featured Anakin and Darth Vader. And of course, no Yoda timepiece can be ignored. For such display-worthy goodness and quality, these easily reign supreme in BK’s movie watch galaxy.