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Brilliant Cartoon Reboots: And the Winners Are…


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?Instead of being too lazy, I’m a bit too sick today to give a long-winded, flowery intro to this week’s contest results, so all I’ll say is this: Much thanks to Cartoon Network, ThunderCats and the ThunderCats Mane Frame Facebook app for sponsoring the contest! Again, if you want to ThunderCat-erize yourself without the difficulty of cosplay or the shame of becoming a furry, the Mane Frame is the app for you. Please check it out!

Also, if any budding Cartoon Network or Nickelodeon executives are out there, you could do a lot worse than read through these HMs and winners. There’s some shockingly brilliant ideas for rebooting some shockingly terrible classic cartoons and series in here. Anyways, on with the show.


Here are the Honourable Mentions (I’ve rebooted Honorable Mentions; they’re the same except now they use the British spelling):


Dr. Abraxas:

how about a reboot of scrappy doo done in a psychologically scaring mini-series? the premise is simple – scrappy is a former crime solving dog who went nuts and is now a serial killing dog known as Woof Woof. he tricks scooby & company to investigate a crime at a warehouse. it’s a trap of course. the gang is locked inside a maze of deadly traps and challenges and, occasionally, ghosts and monster they need to defeat in typical scooby doo fashion (complete with laugh track). all the while they’re getting taunted by scrappy doo over the intercom – who does feed them scrappy snacks ie clues whenever they succeed with their challenges. the crime they need to solve is who killed vilma – whose body lays in a pool of blood. along the way members of the gang die horrible deaths until we’re left with the other girl and scooby doo. they uncover that vilma’s not dead but working with scrappy doo in order to seek vengance against the gang which never much liked her. it ends with scooby doo sawing off his own tail in order to go fetch help for the girl after vilma’s true demise (complete with price is right fail horns) and scrappy doo seems to escape….


TheDarkPhoenix:

Thundarr the Barbarian could use a good reboot.
Think about it – a planet transformed by the moon breaking into two and half the atmosphere ripped off – the animation sequence of this happening would be awesome on its own. The weird and strange creatures and plants that arise out of what was once familiar- imagine a new breed of borg-like people who fused with their bluetooth sets and ipods, superintelligent cats and dogs.
What this future civilization would make of internet porn?
It could really be great!


SlyDante:

Behold the GameSpace, a universe consisting of all video game concepts, characters, & worlds that ever were, are, or will be. Keeping the GameSpace in order is the House of N, a GL Corps-style organization named after the original Game Master, a legendary hero.
The Game Masters from the House are known as Captains, & each patrol their own GameSpace area of their expertise…Captain PS3, Captain Wii, etc. And each one has their own team of recruited video game heroes that they work with.
Since the GameSpace is a house of living ideas & imagination, their job is to protect it from any notable threats that might corrupt the GamerSpace. As such, the Captains have “real world” occupations tied into gaming in order to sort of help out both ways (notably, they can jump between worlds at will).

This brings us to Jon Kreutz, a young gaming journalist. After amassing an impressive Gamerscore, Jon is brought via a transdimensional warp to become the new Captain 360. Inside, he will team up with several of his favorite 360 heroes, such as The Gunstringer, ‘Splosion Man, Meat Boy, & more…Not to mention the other Captains & their friends, for a series of gaming adventures he won’t soon forget…

So yeah, a Captain N reboot. Except with actual respect for the games. And in an age where major video games are sharply divided into realistic, “mature” action games & obnoxiously fluffy “casual gaming”, I want to be able to show kids that you can have youth-appropriate games that are both fun & original (combating my nerd fear with better nerdiness, you could say), hence the theme of creativity, & why there’s more of a focus on smaller, unique XBLA/indie/etc. titles & characters.* Though Captain 360 is the main focus, a noticable amount of emphasis is still placed on the other Captains & their teams.
The show is influenced a bit, among other things, by Scott Pilgrim (particularly Jon’s character) & Edgar Wright-style action, with a lot of retro gaming aesthetics in places & a slight anime influence, & is a blend of both humor & action.


Masterbow:

Reboot Captain Bucky O’Hare. Keep the awsome theme song. Make it so Wille cant get home, the war with the toads more dangerous so its not just Bucky’s crew fighting the entire war and most importantly make sure it lasts longer than one season.


DoctorGoddamnBatman:

Okay, Robert. Spread your earlobes to this throbbing beast of a contest entry:

We open on a cruise ship, populated by sexy young men and women, partying, bathing and being privileged. A nervous looking man in a turban is looking nervous as Tuxedo-clad waiters stride by carrying trays of champagne flavoured money. Beads of sweat drip from the turban man’s face, and suddenly he stands up, screaming some kind of foreign prayer. He tears his robes open and reveals a large ticking bomb strapped to his chest. The sexy passengers scream and panic, with many of their clothes being torn off in the commotion. An old man, seemingly unfazed by the chaos, lies on a deckchair with the brim of a sunhat hiding his face. The turban bomber guy screams for everybody to get down, and notices the old man’s calm demeanour. Enraged, he marches towards the man and grabs him. Suddenly the old man counters the move, does some kind of kung fu shit and breaks the man’s arm. The two do battle, and the old man easily lifts the bomber over his head, spins him around and hurls him into a nearby swarm of sharks, creating an enormous explosion. We see the explosion from 23 different angles. The old man slowly turns back to the passengers of the boat and simply states ‘Some days you just can’t get rid of a bomb’. Adam West removes his sun hat to reveal the Bat cowl, and the familiar theme music (now covered by Linkin Park) kicks up. Welcome to Batman: Senior Year.


Troutwine:

Without a doubt Dungeons and Dragons deserves to resemble the actual game it’s based on, not some bizarrely-premised show that had so very little to do with the source material. Not only would it benefit from being given a proper treatment, but done right, it would be a gateway to kids (and adult kids) getting back into the pen-and-pencil game it’s based on. Get rid of the strange “classes” of the characters and bring in basic, easy-to-understand characters like armored warriors, wizards, priests, rangers (okay, keep the ranger idea from the original). Get rid of the silliness and focus on what makes fantasy gaming awesome – frightening monsters, an actual scary bad guy, deadly magic – instead of tiny talking unicorns (Sorry, Uni!)

Premise: 5 or 6 diverse teens accidentally travel through a rip in the space-time continuum or whatnot, transported to a fantasy world and know they have to get back to Earth. They take roles that mirror their Earth personalities without being silly about it, (and since they’re from “elsewhere” the idea that they’d have some magical mojo in this land would fit), and they learn that their only way back is to find and defeat the One True Enemy of the land who is spoken of but rarely, if ever, seen, who is on one side of a grisly, long-lasting war that has a LotR grim-and-gritty feel instead of the silly surroundings of the original cartoon.

The episodes find the heroes fitting in with the “good” army, going on missions that bring them closer to the One True Enemy and also improve their standing in this army which is their only hope to getting back, and they have to keep their real goal secret because exposing it will expose who they really are (which would lead to even the good guys trying to do away with them for being “outlanders”).
Finite, fun, fantasy.


Yordoom:

A new Swat Kats, done by genndy tartakovsky, giving him total creative control and a near infinite budget. The original is one of my favorites, and the depth of potential that genndy can bring to the table is a goldmine. Imagine the glory of the midair dogfights, hand to hand duels, and confusingly sexual anthromorphic kats.
IIIIIIIIIIIIMAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINE!


Dillon J.:

Bucky O’Hare is a rabbit-shaped Han Solo, the way God intended. He inherited
his ship, the Righteous Indignation, from his father who was killed at the
start of the Toad Wars. He assembles a crew and plans an infiltration of
their empire to kill the unseen emperor of the Toad army. Meanwhile, boy genius Willy DuWitt is
selected by the Toad Interstellar Brilliance Collection to work in their
science camps. When O’Hare and his crew
sneak into the home world of the Toad Empire, and during their break-in Bucky
is faced with either taking his one shot at the Toad Emperor or saving Willy
and the many scientists from different worlds that are imprisoned. Choosing the latter, Bucky is soon confronted
with the realization that the Toad Emperor, KOMPLEX, is actually a computer. To escape, Willy manages to temporarily
disrupt KOMPLEX and the crew leaves the planet.
Bucky and Willy make a deal: Willy helps defeat KOMPLEX and end the Toad
Wars, and Bucky returns Willy to Earth.
This is Bucky O’Hare and the Toad Wars.


ZaneJosh:

Rebooting….. DuckTales!
Duckburg is now a grim, gritty city, a la Nolan’s Gotham. The one man, er, duck who could make a difference has hidden himself away in his money pit & hasn’t been seen or heard from in 20 years, except by his loyal manservant, Duckworth. This man is Scrooge McDuck.
Three young, inventive ducks are dropped off at his doorstep. Scrooge is their last remaining blood relation, their Uncle Donald having mysteriously disappeared on a mission for the U.S. Navy. Slowly, the energy of Huey, Dewey & Louey bring about a change in old Scrooge. He knows he can’t fight the multitude of scourges Duckburg now faces, but he can bankroll those who can.

A quiet accountant named Fenton Crackshell labors away for McDuck Enterprises. His brilliant mind wasted inside a weak body. His one friend is an eccentric old inventor named Gyro Gearloose who used to work for the R&D division of McDuck, but now spends his days working on nonsense… Something about a robotic battle suit…
Every week, Flintheart Glomgold, The Beagle Boys, Magicka DaSpell & every other evil doer in Duckburg will begin to know fear as these separate but connected forces slowly rise, bringing an end to
the terror and hopelessness that has seized the once great city.

DuckTales! The Rise of GizmoDuck!


Joseph W.:

A reboot of King Arthur and the Knights of Justice:
The first three episodes show the fall of Camelot as Queen Morgana and Lord Viper slowly hunt the original knights down one by one, until only Arthur is left. Before heading out to face Morgana, Arthur tells Merlin to find replacements for the knights to defend everyone from Morgana. Ep. 4 opens up with a football game taking place, and the Knights scoring to end the game. Arthur King is the second string QB of the team, and helps the starter, Lance, pick the plays each game. As the starting offense and Arthur ride home from the game, they get sent back in time and blah, blah, blah, just as the original series. This time, instead of just overpowering the enemy, the Knights must use more hit-and-run tactics to weaken Morgana’s forces so they can claim the keys, and free the original knights. Arthur, instead of being the buff field general, takes a backseat, and comes up with the plans of attack, while Lance acts as the field commander and leads the remaining knights.Lots of butting heads, lots of guerilla warfare, Arthur not taking direct command of the battlefield.


RJMac:

I would do Jayce and Wheeled warriors.
Not set in Space but set on a Planet Similar to Earth, Where the planet is overrun with technology and sky ships sail the skies. Using land vehicles to mine and fight for resources. A scientist creates a super crop but it evolves and changes into a living organism that can blend organics with technology.
Having the only pure sample of the super crop, he gives it to his assistants, a young girl and robot helper to take to his son Jayce, who’s serving on a military vessel, and when they are attacked by sky pirate vessel ‘The Pride of the skies II’ and the Monstermind plant…everything changes forever.


Brando Lars:

Disney’s Gargoyles. The show was already awesome (the only Disney cartoon that had a character swear in it, and in the very first episode too.)

In the new show Goliath and his trusty band of Monsters would have a much harder time adapting to this new world they wake up in. Preferring to dish out justice their way (a tad bit more savagely at very least, They were from the middle ages in Scotland after all) Elisa Maza is very much a Jack Mcgee type character for the first season chasing the clan and losing credibility with her fellow officer while doing so. She Looses her job as a cop and becomes a Private investigator. The fairies run a corporation called the Summernights Organization. and while they seem to be a caring not for profit agency their real purpose is prepare the world for the return of their exiled King Oberon by any means necessary. Mac Beth runs a Drug company and while he is still immortal, now it’s because he is a clockwork man a la Frankenstein. He is developing a drug to make super soldiers for the army( and to protect himself against the fairies when they try to take over) Our main nemesis is weapons contractor David Xanatos (who still has his left hand man Owen Burnett.) who is descended from a long line of Guardians of the stoneflesh, and believes he leads the Gargoyles. He goes so far as to smash one the Gargoyle statues during the day try get them to fall into line (having the opposite effect and driving them away) the smashed Gargoyle returns later as ColdStone half Gargoyle half Cyborg.


Cory Flanagan:

God damn it. Of all the things they’ve tried to reboot, or that they’ve announced to reboot, why haven’t they tried rebooting Inspector Gadget. Come on. This is the coolest shit ever. You’ve got this awesome cyborg detective solving crimes with his niece and their dog, who are constantly getting buffeted by this evil organization who’s only discernible goal is the destruction of said cyborg. How does whoever the fuck deciding what gets rebooted not see this set up and go “Hey. This shit could be amazing.”

A fucking cyborg with gadgets for every single limb of his body solving crimes writes itself. You could give Penny a techgirl thing, fixing Gadget whenever he suffers any sort of damages. Give M.A.D. a goal other than DESTROY GADGET. That can be their goal over all, but the motive could be explained easy enough. Government technology in Gadget, stealing his parts and making their own damn robot, THIS ISN’T IMPOSSIBLE, PEOPLE. And as far as Brain goes, well…If the new Thundercats cartoon can do something with Snarf, there’s about 999999999x more potential with a super intelligent dog.

So please. Even if I don’t win this contest, whoever’s reading this that might have a say in the matter. GIVE ME A NEW INSPECTOR GADGET CARTOON.


LamarRevenger:

Earth.. The 23rd century.. It’s a time of robots & aliens. But it is also a time of danger & destruction. 25 years have pasted since the destruction of SHADOW and the planet super computer UMBRA. Robert Simmons is a grizzled man. Shunned by the Galactic Patrol’s higher command he is hidden from the rest of the force. Forced to shut down his creations, he sits passing the time with a bottle of scotch. One day he is nearly killed by a curious robotic design. Realizing the threat of SHADOW is out there still, he takes matters into his own hands. Hopefully his creations will be up to the challenge. Rob Simmons will go against the Galactic Patrol & the United Planets to resurrect THE MIGHTY ORBOTS.


Rodney Sweet:

“Transformers, the Cybertronian Wars”, in this reboot, the campy action cartoon becomes a serious political intrigue/character study/war cartoon, sort of Game of Thrones meets the new Battlestar Galactica.
It follows Megatron, from his service in the Cybertronian defense force and his rise to the leader of the Decepticons and his attempt to overthrow Cybertron. The ruling council of Cybertron, knowing they are no match for Megatron’s army, which can transform into weapons of destruction, use the technology to hide themselves, and stage guerrilla attacks on the Deceptions. Eventually, they are able to retake a foothold and the first Cybertronian war has begun with the conflict draining Cybertrons resources and causing widespread destruction.


Dr. DickMove:

James Stock is a hotheaded orphan living at Warfield Academy, getting into fights and macking on the ladies. But his life changes forever when he discovers that he may in fact be the illegitimate son of secret agent James Bond, of the British Secret Service, and that he has secretly been groomed all these years to become a secret agent, following in the footsteps of his (possible) father (who has been MIA for quite a while when the series begins, and is considered by most people to be dead)! Determined to uncover the truth, Stock escapes from Warfield and goes on the run, in an attempt to track down his father and find some answers. But outside of the protection of Warfield, he quickly discovers that there are those out there who want revenge on Bond Sr. (who has been MIA for quite some time at the start of the series and is largely believed to be dead), and consider his son to be a perfectly acceptable substitute target. Renaming himself after his (possible) father, the newly christened James Bond Jr. races to stay one step ahead of both his fathers enemies and MI6, on a never ending (or at least season long) quest to find the guy who may or may not be his dad… anyway, if that doesn’t work for you, I say fuck it. Lets reboot ‘Capital Critters’..


J_Lucy:

Easy. Dinosaucers.
We’d start out on the home planet, Reptilon. It is revealed
that the planet is an alternate dimension, where dinosaurs did not die out, but
instead continued to evolve. A group of scientists develop the technology in order
to visit our Earth, but it’s stolen by the villainous Tyrannos–remnants of an
old, wicked government regime that wish to once again rule with an iron claw. A
brave group comprising of several anthropomorphic dinosaurs with varying
skills, the leader being Allo, a formerly-great soldier looking to regain his
place in the ranks after he is held accountable for Tyrannos getting to Earth in
the first place. Many see Allo’s placement as the head of the team as pure
nepotism at work. Amongst others are Dimetro, the oldest and scientist of the
Dinosaucers, Bronto Thunder, who goes along as a guide and expert on Earth
culture (although his information painfully is dated, at best), Stego, who, despite
his enthusiasm as a soldier, isn’t effective, Tricero, who should, by all
accounts, be the one in charge, Bonehead, the young stowaway of the group and
Allo’s nephew, Ichy, who is seldom seen and struggles with his spirituality
versus duty as a soldier, and Teryx, who
goes along as a publicity stunt while her popularity as an actress feigns. Instead
of di-volving they are able to take human forms, and attempt to balance their
Earth-covers with their mission: to stop Tyrannos from gaining the resources it
needs to return and rule again.


Monolith100:

The Prophecy is coming true, and Dark Water is appearing in the remote waters of Ruul. Not simply a “monster from the deep”, Dark Water is wrecking the world’s ecology, one sea at a time. Rumors of whole islands from the fringes disappearing beneath the opaque waves.
A mis-matched crew of criminals and pariahs seek to forestall the prophecy, under the direction of Ren, Prince of Octopon. Set on the infamous pirate ship, the Wraith, Iuz and Zoolie struggle against each other for control. The mysterious Tula, secret operative of the Ecomancers, plays the cast against each other while furthering her own agenda. Niddler is a slave/pet of the ship, taking his anger and frustration out on the unwary. An expanded cast of new secondary characters rounds out the crew.

In conflict with the Wraith is the Maelstrom, rogue mercenary vessel captained by Bloth, but both are caught in the overreaching war between the island nations. who themselves seek the Thirteen Treasures. Stories will be rife with tentative alliances and unexpected betrayals between these factions, with strange bedfellows becoming necessary to achieve their goals as treasures are stolen and re-stolen yet again.
And woven into all this intrigue, the agents of the Dark Disciple put their own plans int action…

Visual imagery will be emphasized to give the setting an alien yet familiar feel. Wayne Douglas Barlowe designing the creatures, Mike Mignola on the cultures, both inputing story ideas along with the writers for a more cohesive overreaching plot.
(In Hollywood Producer speak: “A mix of Blake’s 7, Farscape, and Firely, but with the sensibilities of Battlestar Galactica (remake) and Pirates of the Caribbean.”)

Ghenga665:

This cartoon will move in the opposite direction of Thundercats. Whereas that show is about a group struggling under the thumb of an overwhelming force, this would be about a well-heeled group working against an insidious enemy. In the year 4040, the colonized portion of the galaxy is in a state of almost total peace, to the point that there isn’t any formal military.

In this setting, a small time smuggler investigates a backwater world, hoping to find valuable minerals. Instead, he discovers that the world in the fabled “Moon-Star of Limbo”, an ancient device intended to engineer soldiers for a widescale invasion. The machinery imbues the criminal with immense power and a reinforced metallic carapce. He decides to use the Moon-Star to empower other criminals, and create a small army to take over the galaxy.

As Mon-Starr’s forces grow, the powers that be decide that they need to manufacture a counter-force as quickly as possible to oppose his operations. Retired police Sargent Flynn Stargazer proposes a creation of a surgical-grade strike force to respond to Mon-Starr related incidents as quickly as possible. He personaly oversees the project, involving the grafting of military technology to victims of the Mon-Starr and his goons, conditioning them to peak fighting condition. They are code-named “The Silverhawks”.

As the series progresses, questions are raised as to how truthful Stargazer has been about the ‘Hawk’s origins, as well as to what degree Mon-Starr’s actions are his own. The whole story would build to an alien invasion that, it has turned out, has engineered the main conflict as a distraction.
Featuring the voices of Frank Welker, Johnny Yong Bosch, Steve Blum, and Stone Cold Steve Austin as Bluegrass.


JediCreeper:

a loving family with two biological children, two adopted children, a mother and a father with a mysterious past. When a horrible accident threatens the lives of his family, Jack Bennett is forced to involve the agency he worked for, the SPL, to save their lives. Dr. Amadeus Sharp steps in to help.
Changed, enhanced by mechanical implants… Bennett’s family will never have a normal life again.
When the brother of the man who helped them begins to aggressively pursue their secrets in a bid for eternal life, his associates attempt to kidnap the family and literally tear them apart. they must fight back.

Agent-1, Jack, the original, with enhanced vision, hearing, strength and invulnerability

Mother-1, Helen, now a telepath with psychokinetic abilities and a protective streak towards her family, she will rampage if she feels they are in danger
Athlete-1, Eric, sports fan, master of magnetism, force fields, with unerring aim and focus

Rocket-1, Meg, the youngest, hot tempered, sonic speedster with a habit for inadvertent destruction
Comp-1, JD, african-american, older than eric, the smartest member of the family, arguably smarter than Dr. Sharp, he is also the strongest, yet the most cautious
Sun-1, Bunjiro, japanese daughter, martial artist, gymnast, flyer, pyrokinetic, lovable prankster

they are the Bionic Six


Pete Clines:

When anthropology graduate students Brenda Crag, Deborah “DeeDee”
Shale, and Tiffany “Taffy” Stone find a frozen Cro-Magnon Man above the arctic
circle, they think it’s the find of the century. But when their subject turns out to be alive
inside his block of glacial ice, these teen angels learn the scary truth about
the primordial world. Their Cro-Magnon
Man is named Khap-Ton, the leader and sole survivor of a team of early superhumans
who saved the Earth from a group of cold-blooded lizard men. It turns out not all of the dinosaurs died
out in the great cataclysym. Worse yet,
Khap-Ton and his team didn’t stop them… and some are still alive today,
hiding in the modern world.

Armed with superhuman strength, the prehistoric power of his
mystical oaken warhammer, and the teen angels as his companions, “Captain
Caveman” picks up his mission where he left off–trying to stop a hidden race of
mysterious reptiles that wants to reclaim the world as its own.

Scooter Atreides:

Danger Mouse. Edgar Wright would helm it and keep much of the tone of the original, just slightly modernized and a bit more mature. Simon Pegg would star, voicing a straight-laced, somewhat arrogant DM: He’s the best spy in the world, and knows it. Nick Frost would voice an updated Penfold: More of a slacker than a coward. Timothy Spall is Baron Greenback, bringing all the sliminess of his past roles to bear as DM’s nemesis. Eddie Izzard is his lieutenant: Stiletto. Instead of a Cockney stereotype, he’s suave and sophisticated, and prides himself on being able to talk anyone into anything, a counter to Spall’s uncouth Baron. DM’s boss, Colonel K, is now female and voiced by Emily Watson: She’s strict and almost cold–DM reveres her, while Penfold hates her guts (a feeling that she returns with equal vehemence). Rowan Atkinson is the narrator.

Overall, think Hot Fuzz meets Archer with talking rodents.


Darthatheos:

The
Inhumanoids
Thousands
of years ago there was a world war being fought, but not by man. Creatures
called the Inhumanoids sought to rid the world of the human race. Led by the
evil Metlar and his(?) minions Tendril and D’Compose, the Inhumanoids raised
chaos across the globe. Until a group of Inhumanoids seeing humanity as a race
capable of great things, broke ranks and formed a group called the Mutores.
With the help of the Mutores, humanity was able to defeat the forces of the
Inhumanoids

With
Metlar imprisoned deep below the Earth, the forces of the Inhumanoids returned
to their hiding places and slept. Tendril was imprisoned in a chamber a mile
beneath the Gobi desert in China. D’Compose was thrown into the caldera deep
below Yellowstone. With their job done, the Mutores receded into the background
to watch over humanity. Humanity forgot the war and spread across the globe.

In
2020 the world was at the environmental tipping point. Oil was running out,
coal was becoming more expensive by the day. Scientists in China began an
experiment in the Gobi desert. Attempting to reach the Earth’s mantle, the
Chinese used methods similar to those used by the Russians at the Kola
Institute between 1960-1975, they almost succeeded.

Discovering
a mysterious chamber at the one mile mark, the scientists inadvertently released
Tendril. He(?) quickly released D’Compose, and the two managed to free Metlar.
The Inhumanoids were back. It was now humanities responsibility to stop them.
Led by General Herman Armstrong, and armed with the H.E.R.C. (Heavy Equipment
Robotic Chassis) suit, the U.N. task force dubbed “Earthcore” battles the evil
forces of the Inhumanoids.


Ryan Hill:

REBOOT: Captain N: The Game (of Thrones) Master. (or I guess a sequel series but Voltron Force is considered a reboot sort of, right?)

Video Land has evolved since the last time we saw Kevin and the N-Team defending it
from Mother Brain all those years ago. Since Kevin… there have been 4 other Captain N’s (Super N, N 64, N Cube, and the current Captain Wii) and there is about to be a NEW Captain chosen (Captain U, I guess). All the previous Captains have to unite to help bring him into Video Land in time to stop a terrible brawl. The Evils of Gannon, Bowser and Mother Brain have recently fallen away after a long war, leaving the united worlds of Video Land in a state of rebuilding… but that circumstance has cleared the way for a possible civil war between the castles of Hyrule and the Mushroom Kingdom. The Mushroom Kingdom monarchy has long been the seat of power in Video Land, but after the world just barely survived this last conflict, Link (learning a lesson from the Tri-Force) feels power needs to be divided in order to be truly just and fair and that a ruling monarchy is no longer the answer. Mario feels that the one seat of power unites the different worlds, and that too many princesses in too many other castles will leave Video Land more vulnerable and open to attack. All the previous Captain Ns try and help broker a peace between the forces aligning behind both Link and Mario. Ultimately they fail but are hopeful that the arrival of the new Captain can come and usher in harmony. But he/she will have to work fast as the forces of darkness are stoking the fires of a civil war from the shadows hoping this will finally be Video Lands downfall.


Lethargychick:

The year is 2150; global warming has wiped out 99% of the Human race. The surface of the globe is almost entirely ocean.
A small ragtag team of marine scientists and soldiers have established camp in an island system that was once the Kazakhstan ski resort known as “Shymbulak.”
In a last ditch hope for mankind’s future, they go on a mission to build an underwater society. While constructing their community, they discover:

The SNORKS.

This bizarre race of humanoid sea creatures reluctantly agree to allow the humans to build within their territory. When Dr. Shelly Nicolich forms a feminine bond with beautiful snork Daffney Gliffin, the future of Mankind and Snorkkind is put to the test.
What ensues is a violent, action-packed and sex-crazed metaphor for colonization, gay rights, and the human condition.

SNORKS, THE REBOOT.
(When the Smurfs have drowned, the Snorks will rise)

And now for the winners, who will receive both a ThunderCats t-shirt and an action figure for their troubles…


Chyromaniac:

Frank Miller’s All-Star Darkwing Duck
A cloud of smoke, and he appears! The daring duck of mystery is ready to deliver his own brand of justice to the pimps and pushers polluting the gritty streets of St. Canard. Emotionally scarred by the brutal murder of his parents in a back alley, Drake Mallard now swoops out of the shadows as Darkwing Duck. Accompanied by his adopted daughter Goslyn, he battles the scum of the city- including the psychotic serial killer Quackerjack. Somewhere some villains scheme- but they’ll know their number is up when they hear Darkwing Duck say-
“LET”S GET GODDAMN DANGEROUS!!!”

Oh, come on. I think the moment we all saw this we knew it was going to win. Darkwing Duck done in modern (i.e., insane) Frank Miller style? Gold, Jerry.


tooDRUNKtotastethisCHICKEN:

AMC presents – THE JETSONS.
And I only need four words; think:
MAD MEN in SPACE.
(Tagline: “Never has space been so hot.”)
George Jetson: a smooth, sex-crazed Don Draper-esque account executive at Spacely Space Sprockets.
Jane Jetson: a housewife bored with being left in the house for nine hours a week while George is at work, decides to let her hair down–and then some.
Judy Jetson: a budding teenage girl soon to get caught up in a heady world of sex, drugs, and fast (rocket)cars.
Elroy: young spaceboy oblivious to the failings of the rest of the family.
And Rosie: an ordinary household robot hiding a deep dark secret. George Jetson is always trying to “keep up with the Joneses” in everything else–why is he keeping this outdated model around?

Add in hostile corporate takeover attempts of Spacely Space Sprockets by Cogswell Cosmic Cogs, period-specific details, and SEXSEXSEX!, AMC and Hanna-Barbera is sure to have a new–and sexy–hit on their hands.

There were a few Jetsons-themed entries in this week’s contest, but none quite so clever as this one. Seriously, the Jetsons suck, I hate the Jetsons and yet I would watch the living hell out of a Jetsons redone Mad Men style. This might partially be because I immediately imagined Christina Hendricks as Rosie the Robot, but I’m okay with that.


J Kentner:

Visionaries: Knights of the Magical Light. (I know it was originally a toy line, but there was a cartoon, so there.) The main conflict would stay the same, but Merklynn would play a much bigger role. He would have his own agenda and you were never quite sure if he was good or evil. When the Spectral Knights and Darkling Lords would come back to replenish their staffs (I would do away with the imbuing vehicles), Merklynn’s quests would make them help or hurt others bringing notions of personal morality vs power to protect family/friends or power to complete your own objectives. For the Knights, it’s is this power worth what Merklynn will ask of them? For the Lords, can they put aside their own immediate desires and emotions to gain the power to make them real? Knights and Lords would be forced to work together to see if they can put aside animosities and differences. Then a third group comes in, loyal to only Merklynn. Can both the original groups stand up to Merklynn or stay subservient to him for the power he can give them? Can they survive this tech wasteland without his magic? Or is the pull of his promise of power and safety enough to make them turn from either what they know is right, or what they feel their destiny is? Find out on Visionaries: Knights of the Magical Light!

I’m not sure what to say about this entry other than it is literally the most interested I have ever been in Visionaries. It’s a nice reminder that all anyone really needs to do to reboot the basic, wacky premises of the franchises of our youth is 1) stop pretending kids are morons and 2) tell good, interesting, complex stories (admittedly, these two things are related). Do the lines between good and evil blur a bit? Awesome. Get kids thinking about that. Making children think is a good thing, people.


Agent0range:

Captain Planet.
It’s the distant future. Civilization has been destroyed by nuclear
warfare. In this world, where most just struggle to survive, a few
ruthless individuals have wrestled control– think Hokuto no Ken.
Though they are constantly plotting against one another, they have
briefly decided to join together to create an army of metahumans in
pursuit of power.

Their plan, however, does not remain secret, and rumors of it soon reach
a pair of freedom fighters: A young girl calling herself Gaia and a
mysterious man known only as The Captain. Seeking the truth, they go
after their enemies and learn two things: the project is very real, and
the prototypes are impressionable children. Gaia and Captain kidnap
them in hopes of bringing them over to the cause of freedom.

The show would follow an adventure-of-the-week format from here,
focusing on the five metahuman prototypes– Kwame, Wheeler, Linka, Gi,
and Ma-ti, of course. The rings are replaced with innate abilities and
the kids do all the battling and problem-solving on their own– Captain
does not serve as deus ex machina. There is a lot of grey morality all
around; though the leaders are cruel, they do restore some order, and
though the kidnappers seem to be the moral ideal… well, they are
radical enough to kidnap and attempt to brainwash children. It’d be a
coming-of-age tale as the Planeteers choose how best to help the world. For the record, Ma-ti would be a really badass psychic.

And if you combine all the different sorts of awesomeness in the first three winning entries you get AgentOrange, and his amazing reboot for Captain Planet. Dude, just the premise alone is enough to make my nerdy bits tingle — what the fuck does Captain Planet do when the planet is already half-destroyed?! God, I want this to happen so bad. Someone get Ted Turner on the phone, he might just be crazy and bitter enough nowadays to approve this masterpiece.

And th-th-that’s all, folks. Congrats to the winners, and thanks to everyone who entered — and again, thanks to Cartoon Network’s ThunderCats for both sponsoring the contest and being totally awesome. Hopefully more cartoon reboots will follow down its footsteps… er, paw prints.