It’s a holiday tradition in our household to watch the North American Air Defense “tracking” of Santa Claus online every Christmas Eve. We never knew he needed these kinds of helpers – jets laden with missiles to help fly the unfriendlier skies, new for 2013 and giving new meaning to the idea of a War on Christmas.
“We wanted to let folks know that, hey, this is a NORAD video, and we’re the military and this is our mission,” said the spokesman, Navy Captain Jeff Davis.
Not to disparage our military’s capability, but do they know where every single child in the world is, and precisely how good or bad or potentially Santa-murdering they’ve been this year? (Of course not. That’s the NSA’s job [/sarcasm].) Santa’s got this, but if our tiny CGI Air Force pilots want a fun assignment, why not? It shouldn’t be us protecting Santa, though – Santa should be the one protecting us…because I trust his list a good deal more than I trust the No-Fly one. He actually checks things twice.