Your mission was to describe a scene from the upcoming X-Men: Apocalypse movie.
I tried to go for a mix of the silly and the sublime with these, from jokey entries to honest to goodness Holy Shit moments that could happen.
Because there are six winners, there won’t be any honorable mentions. If you are one of the winners, please email your name, TR username, address, shirt size and URL of the Marvel shirt you pick to toplessrobot at gmail.
Now, let us find out who you are:
The X-Men and Brotherhood are standing outside of a fancy looking metal pyramid that we learn was hidden underneath the one Apocalypse was building in the post credit scene. Charles is the only Horseman left and he is guarding Apocalypse within this pyramid. Everyone has tried to break through the door using their various powers.
BEAST: We can’t get through. The door is literally immovable.
Magneto has an idea. He looks east and starts pulling.
MAGNETO: Well then what we need is an unstoppable force.
In a secret holding facility, the circuitry starts flickering and a metal tomb is flung open. An alarm sounds. A shirtless Cain Marko a.k.a. Juggernaut (played by Haf??r J?l?us Bj?rnsson, the most recent Mountain from Game of Thrones) steps out. He is disoriented. Suddenly pieces of metal start stripping off of the wall and covering his biceps, forearms, and knuckles. His original helmet explodes out of a containment chamber and lands on his head. The metal straps raise the Juggernaut through the ceiling and into the air. He flies to Egypt at an incredible speed and lands on the sand in front of the team.
MAGNETO: Juggernaut. I need you to get through that door.
JUGGERNAUT: What’s in it for me?
MAGNETO: Charles is inside.
The Juggernaut takes a three point runner starting position.
JUGGERNAUT: Stay out of my way.
Post-credits stinger: Reveal a large room full of monitors. Each one depicts one of the major action pieces from the film. They all pause at once, and the camera swings around to reveal MOJO (Patton Oswalt), gleefully declaring that his ratings are going to be be amazing.
Bonus: In a totally unexpected bit of corporate cooperation, instead of just moments from the film, other screens depict scenes from the Spider-Man, FF, Ghost Rider and MCU/Avengers films.
DOUBLE BONUS: Mojo specifically examines a still from “Agents of SHIELD” and remarks on how cute Eric Koenig is.
Bird’s-eye shot of Xavier’s Institute. The caption at the bottom says Westchester County, 1985. There’s a small cloud of dust visible, quickly approaching the front of the school.
Switch to the front door as the dust cloud reaches the door and stops. The dust settles and Pietro (Peter?) Maximoff is visible. He knocks on the door, then pulls his sleeve down, reading something on his wrist. The door swings open and a young Scott Summers is standing in the doorway, but he barely says hello before Pietro runs into the house.
Pietro arrives in Charles’ office, knocking the door open and standing before his desk in seconds. When Charles looks up in alarm, Pietro tugs his sleeve up all the way and reads the words inked onto his arm.
“En Sabah Nur.”
The epic battle of Apocalypse taking down various mutants and causing mass destruction is shown on the a TV news broadcast. The camera pans from the TV set to a group of politicians and businessmen watching that includes Bolivar Trask who smugly says “Bet you wish you’d built my giant robots now”.
I would love to see this
Magneto and the X-men show up to stop the culling. Apocalypse and his minions are laying waste to everything. Magneto attacks but is struck down by Apocalypse.
As he moves in for the kill, Cable steps out from behind a building in all his glory. Guns so big they should be mounted to a tank, metal arm shining, solar flare eyeball, and pouches, lots of pouches.
Apocalypse says “Who are you?”
Cable moves in close and says “I’m the distraction”
Magneto blasts Apocalypse. Sending him through a building.
Magneto says “Go help the others Morph”
Cable changes into Morph and say “Right boss”
I’d like to see Ryan Reynolds as Deadpool pop up, in full 100% CORRECT COSTUME, and square off against Wolverine.
“Hey, “bub”, remember me?” Deadpool says, sarcastically uses fingers as quote marks.
“Who the hell are you supposed to be? Reject Spiderman costume from comicon?” Wolverine replies as he grimaces towards his foe, clad in red and black
” Hahaha…ah no.” Deadpool says as he gently and slowly removes his swords. “Maybe this will jog your memory.”
Deadpool begins doing that sword spin thing he so enjoys doing to show off his skill and control. The blades whirl about, appearing as two helicopter blades in front of the merc. “Impressed? I know I am! This shit ain’t easy and…” Before he could finish his taunting, he accidently chops his own arm off just above the elbow.
Wolverine gives that “wtf” look that Jackman displays in every movie.
“Oh. Hmmm…Yeah…” Deadpool says as he reattaches his arm. “You wouldn’t believe how much that hurts! Let me jog your mind. Last time we met, I completely went head over heels for you… As in beheaded… As in you cut mine off… and then dropped a giant cooling tower on me…”
Wolverine squints as he slowly inquires, “Wade?”
Deadpool jumps into Wolverine’s arms like a woman being carried over a threshold on her wedding night. “You remember me!” *Sniffle* “You love me! You really really love me!”
Wolverine drops Deadpool down onto the ground hard.
Deadpool looks up at him endearingly, “I missed you so much!” But quickly, his eyes begin to glare. “But not this time.”
Deadpool removes his gun and shoots Wolverine in the torso several times. With every bullet Deadpool yells “Bang!”
Deadpool stands up as he continues, “Ah Wolvie… BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!”
As Wolverine’s wounds heal in front of them. “Last I saw you, you were tumbling to your death, your eyes blasting lasers and destroying things, those stupid swords hanging out of your arms, and your mouth sewn shut…”
“Ah yes…” Deadpool interupts as he walks forward, placing his index finger upon Wolverine’s lips. “Let’s just forget about all of that. Everyone should forget all about that…”