Ask Luke’s Mother-in-Law: Apocalypse? Nahhh…


Martha Boyd is not just Luke’s mother-in-law – she’s also an ex-cop, a landlord, a self-described crazy cat lady, a major Star Trek geek and the widow of a green beret. So go ahead: ask her anything. But be nice. Being nuts is okay, though.

Hey all – last week was busy with 2 movies to attend. As you know last Thursday was the second film in the Joshua Tree International Film Fest. We saw the documentary Skanks, which followed the play Skanks in a One-Horse Town by Billy Ray Brewton. Mr. Brewton was to be in attendance – but alas he was ill and was unable to attend, and the film got a bit of a late start as the copy that was sent for viewing did not work. But Q came to the rescue and rented it on Amazon. So if you want to see it go to Amazon; if you are a theatre geek you will understand what is going on. If not, you will be a bit bored. Some of the editing is sloppy, but that’s ok. Anyway I love small community theatre and thus I found the documentary enjoyable. I have been involved over the last 20 years with long nights of rehearsal, opening night jitters and then the sound of audience approval – such fun. It has been about 5 yrs since I have been on stage and I am thinking about jumping back in in 2015. Looking at The Mystery of Edwin Drood and The Addams Family Musical.

Anyway the next show is on November 20 and will be the Road to Paloma starring, get this, drum roll…starring Jason Momoa and Lisa Bonet. I understand Mr. Momoa is going to be in some upcoming super hero movie. Hmmmmmm. Hopefully he will be available for an interview. Fingers crossed, jumping up and down etc.

My other big night out was at the Copper Mountain Community Center for movies under the stars. We saw, for a big whopping $3.00, a double feature. Yes, when was the last time you got a double feature for $3.00 bucks? Concessions included homemade tarantula cupcakes (see photo), pumpkin bread, popcorn, candy, hot dogs, soda etc. Anyway the movies started with Our Gang Follies of 1938 followed by Tarantula from 1955. Leo G Carroll was great. Some of the exteriors were filmed out on Hwy 247, which is the road thru Landers, Johnson Valley over to Apple Valley. For 1955, the special effects were pretty good. The monster makeup was great and seeing the oversize tarantula walking around in the desert was great – he even squished a two story house. If you want to watch this great Universal monster flick you can find it online.

So now, my pretties, let’s see what you have for me this week. Our first question this week comes from:


Hey RoboMom

Is there any historical figure who you’d like to see a movie made about that hasn’t had one yet?

Not really. I don’t generally care for historical movies. Can’t remember the last time I went to see one. Well actually I think the last one I saw was Patton with George C. Scott. I only went to that as my dad dragged me to see it . He was with Patton’s army (Engineers) during WWII.

What are the best card games to play with a standard deck of 52+jokers?

Well, I like poker with the jokers wild. Haven’t been able to play a good game in ages. My cats don’t do well with cards, as they tend to eat them.

Robert Downey Jr. Has been getting a lot of flack about being dodgy when addressing the question of whether or not he’ll do a 4th Iron Man movie. What’s your thoughts on this? Is he too old? Is it time for someone younger to step into the role? Should be leave him alone while he sorts it out himself?

Hey, I think he still looks pretty good, and why can’t Iron Man age a bit? So I think he should be left alone and if the studio wants him and he is willing, I say why not. I hate it when they keep changing the person who plays a known character.


The cat in “Alien” is clearly working with the Alien, right?

Of course. All cats are aliens. I know for sure mine are. They talk to the home planet thru the wine cooler in the kitchen and the fountain in the entry. They also love to sit on the bed and listen to Coast to Coast radio every night to hear about all of the alien happenings.


Have you ever been to the Tucson Gem and Mineral Show? I’ve had a recent urge to watch the original Night Stalker T.V. show. Have you seen it, if so did you enjoy it?

Yes, I have been to the Tucson Gem and Mineral Show. Really great. We take a magazine called Rock and Gem which keeps us posted on all of the shows and great articles on rock hounding etc. We just finished the Joshua Tree Gem and Mineral show a couple of weeks ago, but it is small compared to Tucson.

As for The Night Stalker I assume you are referring to the 1974-75 TV show with Darren McGavin. Yes – loved it. Great storytelling. I think you would enjoy it very much. If you were referring to anything having to do with Richard Ramirez, then no. He was known as the Night Stalker and an LA serial killer. I was working in LA when he was running around. By the way, Mr. McGavin was also in the 1972 movie The Night Stalker – you should check this out too.

Dear LYT’s Mother In Law,

I’ve taken up a part-time job in a haunted maze for this month (It is the month of Halloween, after all). And while I am enjoying it, my legs get so sore the next morning after all the late night jumping and it took me days to get rid of it (I work only on the weekends, thank god). Is there a quicker way of getting rid of the soreness? My current technique is taking a long hot bath with Epsom salt.

Long hot bath, aspirin and there is a liniment that a lot of stunt people use called Balsam of Myrrh; really good on the soreness. I learn about the Balsam of Myrrh on the set of Barretta many years ago. Sounds like fun to work at the haunted maze. We don’t even have a haunted house anymore out here. Theatre 29 used to put one on every year, but for some reason they decided to have the last one last year. Out where I like we don’t even have trick or treat, you have to go into town for that. But I have my house decorated with pumpkins, scarecrows etc. Anyway coat your legs with the Balsam of Myrrh before you go to work and after


So when are you and LYT going to fight crime together as undercover gonzo journalists

Well that sounds like a lot of fun. After all LYT is the fast food critic and I am an ex McDonalds employee. To prove it – Two all beef patties special sauce lettuce cheese onions pickles on a sesame seed bun – see I still can remember that after all of these years. Would you believe we had to say that if a customer asked, and if we screwed it up they got a free Big Mac? We also have a friend who is a current Mc.D employee. Interesting, interesting. I love fast food; however my waistline is not too thrilled with it. Have you seen his reviews with Francis the Cat?


QUESTION! Have you ever wondered what the future would smell like? We know the past smelled like manure and sweat, the modern era smells like… this, but what will the future smell like?

Well, I have 2 guesses on this issue. Either computer chips, or manure and sweat, as the grid will have gone down and we will be all back living in the Stone Age.


Do you think the obsession with the apocalypse is simply an expression of people trying to find special meaning in their lives within the time that they live? Also isn’t the world constantly ending and constantly beginning anew?

I think people have been worrying about the apocalypse since the Bible first brought up the subject. It hasn’t happened yet and bet I will not see it in my lifetime. I think people are trying to find meaning in their generally mundane lives. I mean, if you really look at it most of us are pretty darn boring and we do the same things day in and day out. Heavens, you could set your watch by some of our lives. As for the world constantly ending and beginning anew, yep. Every day the sun rises and sets, beginning and ending – the only difference is the slight variation in the time.


I’ll disagree with you on the civil forfeiture. There have been many cases of abuse by law enforcement to line their own pockets. While I’m sure it’s not the norm, with positions of power, once is all it takes to undermine the original goal, and the public’s confidence.

They seized a motel Mass. There had been 15 arrests at the hotel over a 14 yr span. The owner was never charged, just customers, and he cooperated in every investigation. They targeted his place because it was paid off. There were more arrests at other motels in the area and even the local Walmart.
He did get the motel back after spending $100000 in legal fees. Now the tax payers get to pick up the tab for legal cost.

It’s crazy that they thought they could get away with it in the first place, but it has proven out that if you don’t have the money to fight it, they can steal your property.

Totally agree with you; there are many times that there is a misuse of the justice system. However there are more cases when this works then when it goes off the rails. The judicial system is by no means 100% all of the time. We just had a case here in CA were an innocent women was released from prison after about 19 yrs.

Enough of that rant. Now to my pointless question.

No question is pointless.

Wolverine is dead, for the time being. Before he lost his healing power, couldn’t he have been one of the strongest super heroes?

Well I would assume so, but those higher than me decided not.

Couldn’t he have just worked out all the time and gotten instantly stronger from each workout, as his muscles repaired and grew? Bulked up like the Hulk with claws.

See the above answer.

Well folks, that’s all for now. I am going to see a Halloween parade this weekend, which should be fun. Oh, here is a stupid thing I came across: some idiots are talking about banning swing sets at elementary schools. People keep complaining that kids are overweight, so let’s take out something they like to do that gives them exercise. The thought behind this birdbrain idea is they get hurt on the swings. Okay, hands up, how many of you have in the past and still do the jump off the swing so you can fly – me me. Oh and if you are to stupid to walk in front of a moving swing at a close distance then you need to get hit, dumbass. It’s like I remember when the sand disappeared and was replaced with wood chips so we would not get hurt – well guess what the splinters were worse than the sand. How did that one work out? Kids bounce pretty darn well; let them be kids.

Okay, enough of my soap box. As always be good to each other this next week. Have fun at all of your weekend Halloween events and Huggs.

As always, keep those questions coming! Any questions submitted in comments below will be included in future columns.