Topless Robot Self-Pleasure: We’ve Got One Million Page Views!

Hola, senors and senoritas! I wanted to take a moment from my “busy” blogging “work” to give myself a pat on the back, as well as the other fine men, women, and child laborers who have given Topless Robot life. See, late last night, we reached our one millionth page view! Yay! Jason Arango’s lovely and mean-spirited “10 Products Only Douchebags Buy” put us over the top. I’m quite pleased, since the site has only been around since mid-January, and I’ve only been taking it seriously since sometime last week.

Anyways, our one millionth viewer was “Joe,” who left this insightful comment about the “10 Products Only Douchebags Buy” article:

Wow. this is stupid. Everyone wears axe in highschool and spray on tan? maybe they like looking good instead of your whtie pasty nerd ass. and watches with big faces. maybe they can afford nicer versace watches unlike your poor ass plus that’s very nit picky.

go fuck yourself nerd.

Thanks for reading, Joe! We will go fuck ourselves! But not before we send you your prize?Johnny, show “Joe” what he’s won!