Finally, a Baroness Figure I’m Not Attracted To
HissTank has been uncovering scores of G.I. Joe movie toys recently, including the above pic of the Baroness figure. She’s incredibly articulated for a 3 3/4-inch figure, and frankly, I think the sculpting on the body is pretty great, although I’m not a huge fan of the needlessly detailed outfit itself. But that face! THAT’S A DUDE. ARRRRGGH.
No thank you. Adding insult to injury, “her” smug smirk mocks all of us poor nerds who just want to have lascivious thoughts about getting whipped by a hot foreign lady wearing leather. See more pics of the Baroness and Breaker over at HissTank, by the way,
About The Author
Robert Bricken is one of the original co-founders of the site formerly known as Topless Robot, and its first editor-in-chief, serving from 2008-12. He brought the site to prominence with “nerd news, humor and self-loathing” as its motto, raising it from total internet obscurity to a readership in the millions, with help from his savage “FAQ” movie reviews and Fan Fiction Fridays. Under his tenure Topless Robot was covered by Gawker, Wired, Defamer, New York magazine, ABC News, and others, and his articles have been praised by Roger Ebert, Avengers actor Clark Gregg, comedian and The Daily Show correspondent John Hodgman, the stars of Mystery Science Theater 3000 and Rifftrax, and others. He is currently the managing editor of io9.com. Despite decades as both an amateur and professional nerd, he continues to be completely unprepared for either the zombie apocalypse or the robot uprising.