With “Digital Lollipop,” Licking Phones and TVs Will No Longer Be Just for Pervs

A team at the University of Singapore has developed an electrode that can simulate the sensation of taste on your tongue, using alternating currents and temperature changes to fool your taste receptors.

NewScientist magazine envisions a day when you’ll be able to use this technology to wean yourself off sugary drinks, or taste the food on a cooking show. Bit leave it to the New York Times to note a potential minor hitch:

The research is being led by Nimesha Ranasinghe, a Ph.D. research scholar in the university’s department of electrical and computer engineering. He hopes that people will one day be able to lick their television or smartphone to taste virtual things.

Dude, do you know where my phone has been? In my pocket, with leaky pens and soiled tissues. To paraphrase Sam Jackson in Pulp Fiction, my phone could taste like pumpkin pie and I’ll never know, because I won’t lick the filthy motherfucker.

And yet the guy in the video I’m about to show has no issue licking his monitor when there are cameras present…