I READ YOUR FANFIC! “Assassin’s Creed: The Minstrels’ Revenge”


The Abrams-esque lensflare throughout is a total accident – one I may try to duplicate in the future. This week’s fanfic isn’t particularly gross, but it is terrible.

If you want to submit fan fiction for me to read, please send it – or a link to it – to toplessrobot-at-gmail-dot-com with subject line “Read my Fanfic!”

Title: “Assassin’s Creed: The Minstrels’ Revenge” by stevelikepie

Logline: Leonardo da Vinci invents subs and pizza, then Ezio Auditore fights Renaissance-era Power Rangers.

Acts Involved: Pizza-fu, sub-fu, decapitation, head crushing, strangulation, eye gouging, noodle-fu, terrible attempts at Italian, implied incest, broom-handle sodomy.

Participants: Ezio, Leonardo, five minstrels and Ezio’s sister.

The live reading…